Meet A Butch: Rose Blakelock
Hello, my name is Rose Blakelock I was born and raised in South West Ohio, and spent 12 years in New York City. Over the pandemic living in New York became pretty unsustainable, it really laid bare the wealth gap and sort of stripped away all the sheen. I was out of work and collecting unemployment and realized this might be my only shot. So I moved to Northern New Mexico with my girlfriend. Living in the Southwest was always in the long term plan but the pandemic definitely accelerated it. Basically, we just weren’t rich enough to be comfortable, and our nervous systems were trashed.
For work I’m a consulting astrologer, audio editor, musician, and carpenter. I’m also the co-host of a podcast called Big Dyke Energy, along with my friend Gala Mukomolova, an astrologer and poet based in New York City. We hang out and talk shit about the stars and gay celebrities & pop culture.
What does the butch identity mean to you?
I think any gender identity is about living authentically, without affectation. To be butch is not inherently to reject softness or femininity, but to resist the pressure to conform to a prescribed role. To wear your hair how you like it, to prioritize utility, perhaps. To be more interested in what you can do in your clothes than what they communicate.
I remember when I was in my late teens, I was having a conversation with my late Grandmother (we were very close), and she told me;
“I never thought of you as a little boy or a little girl or anything. I thought of you as a person who needed and should have practical skills.”
I think about that, and her, a lot. In some ways, my gender identity has less to do with me naming or aligning myself as “butch” (though I do so proudly and with great reverence), and more to do with me doing what feels comfortable and practical and true to myself. The title came after the fact, and largely from elder queers, mentors, and dates. I was just being myself, and honestly, my style hasn’t changed much since I was 8 years old. I don’t like fuss, I need pockets, I like a crisp shirt and cufflinks. No one ever taught me how to do makeup and that is fine with me–the quicker I could get outside, the better. You ever try to climb a tree in a skirt? It’s annoying!
I realize that my answers may seem like I’m disparaging a more feminine style, or see it as impractical, and I want to be clear that I do not feel that way! I just know what works for me, and believe that everyone should have the space to figure that out for themselves, too.
You’re given $20,000, how would you spend it?
It’s probably douchey to say I would invest in cryptocurrency, right? For really real, though, I would probably buy some books, buy some gifts, donate a chunk, and then fix up my truck and buy some new tools and guitar amps? Oh and fancy vintage synthesizers. Can’t forget about those.
Where do you hope to be ten years from now?
I would like to be more confident that there will be clean water to drink and air to breathe for the rest of my life. I know, big ask there. But beyond hoping to see some big shifts on the large scale, in my own life I would like to live in a sweet house, with a recording studio (maybe an underground lair?) and preferably at the end of a long dirt road butted up to a stream and some woods (not unlike the house my partner and I are renting currently).
What is one thing that you’re really proud of?
I’m proud of betting on myself these last couple years, and stepping up to the challenge. My friend group suffered some pretty heavy losses from 2018 to the beginning of the pandemic. 2 divorces, a death, the breakup of a music project I had been a part of for 12 years. I had to overhaul nearly every aspect of my life; I started my own business, began writing a solo album and recruited a new band, got into therapy and started doing yoga regularly. Things were building and I was starting to feel so much more centered and comfortable with myself. I was playing shows, doing readings, and built a beautiful new kitchen as part of a rent trade.
And then, of course, the pandemic hit. It shook me loose, but also I was so grateful to realize that I could take nearly everything I rebuilt with me, because it wasn’t centered outside of myself. I’m so grateful and proud that my partner and I took the leap and moved to this beautiful, tiny town and are connecting to a community that feels so steady and nourishing. I’m finally starting to feel at home in the world.
What’s the queer scene like where you live and what’s one thing you’d change about it if you could?
Oh man I’d get rid of COVID. It’s a small but really sweet scene. Most of our friends have families, and everyone’s got a fair amount of space to host. To be honest, I was so tired of bathroom lines and too loud bad music. I feel like I sound like the grandpa from the Simpsons or something. But really it’s the revival of the house party, which is my preferred method of hanging out. I do miss karaoke, though I’ve been told I can start a party at the theatre up the road once the virus calms down…
What are your 2 favorite and 2 least favorite memories from childhood?
My first favorite memory is of a make believe musical festival my sister and I would produce. I think it was right after Woodstock ‘94 and we were OBSESSED. We called it “Pootstock” and would go through all the Columbia Records CD catalogues and highlight every band we hated. Then we would announce the line up and proceed to go through the acts, doing very terrible and pretty rude impressions of them, one by one. I remember I had this little electric guitar with, like, a plastic Madonna mic/headphone and a little speaker that you could clip onto your waistband and play out of, but this was before I actually knew any chords so it was really just sheer chaos.
My second favorite memory is from the fourth grade. My sister and I were in class together, and the main receptionist from the office came to the door and said, “Uh, Daisy and Rose? Your dad just called and said he’s picking you up to go see something called ‘Poe’.”
Apparently she had had to cancel a tour date in a neighboring town because she was sick, and decided to do a tiny daytime show on her way back through. We got to see her in a coffee shop in a crowd of about 30 people, and afterwards we even got to go up and meet her. I never really was an autograph person but I do still have that one.
My least favorite memories…Eesh. One is definitely from when I was about 8 years old. My neighbor and I had been super close. We love to play war games, and video games, and strap bottle rockets onto hot wheels cars and watch them go. Sometimes we’d sit on skateboards and let his big golden retriever, Henry, pull us down the street. I don’t really remember much about this day except that it was summer and it was hot so I wasn’t wearing a shirt, which was not that wild, particularly at 8 years old. Then this little jerk told me that I wasn’t allowed to do that any more because I was a girl. He was my first friend! I think he got over it eventually, but that was one of the first times I was confronted with the idea that my options would somehow be limited because of my perceived gender. I was sooo so mad at him. I think I maybe tried to punch him, even?
Another pretty embarrassing one–I was in 5th grade, maybe? Our school would do a musical every year, which we would collectively adapt and direct. This year we chose Mary Poppins. I was dead set on playing Burt the Chimney Sweep, for some reason. We had our audition or whatever it was, and another classmate got the role instead. I was beside myself, crying in my little cubby/cubicle, and being overall a pretty sore loser/drama queen. I guess the girl who got the part felt so bad about it/for me that she talked to our teacher and convinced them to give it to me, after all. I took it, and still feel pretty guilty about it.
What does the butch identity mean to you?
I think any gender identity is about living authentically, without affectation. To be butch is not inherently to reject softness or femininity, but to resist the pressure to conform to a prescribed role. To wear your hair how you like it, to prioritize utility, perhaps. To be more interested in what you can do in your clothes than what they communicate.
I remember when I was in my late teens, I was having a conversation with my late Grandmother (we were very close), and she told me;
“I never thought of you as a little boy or a little girl or anything. I thought of you as a person who needed and should have practical skills.”
I think about that, and her, a lot. In some ways, my gender identity has less to do with me naming or aligning myself as “butch” (though I do so proudly and with great reverence), and more to do with me doing what feels comfortable and practical and true to myself. The title came after the fact, and largely from elder queers, mentors, and dates. I was just being myself, and honestly, my style hasn’t changed much since I was 8 years old. I don’t like fuss, I need pockets, I like a crisp shirt and cufflinks. No one ever taught me how to do makeup and that is fine with me–the quicker I could get outside, the better. You ever try to climb a tree in a skirt? It’s annoying!
I realize that my answers may seem like I’m disparaging a more feminine style, or see it as impractical, and I want to be clear that I do not feel that way! I just know what works for me, and believe that everyone should have the space to figure that out for themselves, too.
You’re given $20,000, how would you spend it?
It’s probably douchey to say I would invest in cryptocurrency, right? For really real, though, I would probably buy some books, buy some gifts, donate a chunk, and then fix up my truck and buy some new tools and guitar amps? Oh and fancy vintage synthesizers. Can’t forget about those.
Where do you hope to be ten years from now?
I would like to be more confident that there will be clean water to drink and air to breathe for the rest of my life. I know, big ask there. But beyond hoping to see some big shifts on the large scale, in my own life I would like to live in a sweet house, with a recording studio (maybe an underground lair?) and preferably at the end of a long dirt road butted up to a stream and some woods (not unlike the house my partner and I are renting currently).
What is one thing that you’re really proud of?
I’m proud of betting on myself these last couple years, and stepping up to the challenge. My friend group suffered some pretty heavy losses from 2018 to the beginning of the pandemic. 2 divorces, a death, the breakup of a music project I had been a part of for 12 years. I had to overhaul nearly every aspect of my life; I started my own business, began writing a solo album and recruited a new band, got into therapy and started doing yoga regularly. Things were building and I was starting to feel so much more centered and comfortable with myself. I was playing shows, doing readings, and built a beautiful new kitchen as part of a rent trade.
And then, of course, the pandemic hit. It shook me loose, but also I was so grateful to realize that I could take nearly everything I rebuilt with me, because it wasn’t centered outside of myself. I’m so grateful and proud that my partner and I took the leap and moved to this beautiful, tiny town and are connecting to a community that feels so steady and nourishing. I’m finally starting to feel at home in the world.
What’s the queer scene like where you live and what’s one thing you’d change about it if you could?
Oh man I’d get rid of COVID. It’s a small but really sweet scene. Most of our friends have families, and everyone’s got a fair amount of space to host. To be honest, I was so tired of bathroom lines and too loud bad music. I feel like I sound like the grandpa from the Simpsons or something. But really it’s the revival of the house party, which is my preferred method of hanging out. I do miss karaoke, though I’ve been told I can start a party at the theatre up the road once the virus calms down…
What are your 2 favorite and 2 least favorite memories from childhood?
My first favorite memory is of a make believe musical festival my sister and I would produce. I think it was right after Woodstock ‘94 and we were OBSESSED. We called it “Pootstock” and would go through all the Columbia Records CD catalogues and highlight every band we hated. Then we would announce the line up and proceed to go through the acts, doing very terrible and pretty rude impressions of them, one by one. I remember I had this little electric guitar with, like, a plastic Madonna mic/headphone and a little speaker that you could clip onto your waistband and play out of, but this was before I actually knew any chords so it was really just sheer chaos.
My second favorite memory is from the fourth grade. My sister and I were in class together, and the main receptionist from the office came to the door and said, “Uh, Daisy and Rose? Your dad just called and said he’s picking you up to go see something called ‘Poe’.”
Apparently she had had to cancel a tour date in a neighboring town because she was sick, and decided to do a tiny daytime show on her way back through. We got to see her in a coffee shop in a crowd of about 30 people, and afterwards we even got to go up and meet her. I never really was an autograph person but I do still have that one.
My least favorite memories…Eesh. One is definitely from when I was about 8 years old. My neighbor and I had been super close. We love to play war games, and video games, and strap bottle rockets onto hot wheels cars and watch them go. Sometimes we’d sit on skateboards and let his big golden retriever, Henry, pull us down the street. I don’t really remember much about this day except that it was summer and it was hot so I wasn’t wearing a shirt, which was not that wild, particularly at 8 years old. Then this little jerk told me that I wasn’t allowed to do that any more because I was a girl. He was my first friend! I think he got over it eventually, but that was one of the first times I was confronted with the idea that my options would somehow be limited because of my perceived gender. I was sooo so mad at him. I think I maybe tried to punch him, even?
Another pretty embarrassing one–I was in 5th grade, maybe? Our school would do a musical every year, which we would collectively adapt and direct. This year we chose Mary Poppins. I was dead set on playing Burt the Chimney Sweep, for some reason. We had our audition or whatever it was, and another classmate got the role instead. I was beside myself, crying in my little cubby/cubicle, and being overall a pretty sore loser/drama queen. I guess the girl who got the part felt so bad about it/for me that she talked to our teacher and convinced them to give it to me, after all. I took it, and still feel pretty guilty about it.
